


Let You Go

by dean_n_pie



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Uhm, dont judge me im actually a good writer i promise, its my first fic and yeah, little ooc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-22
Updated: 2013-09-22
Packaged: 2017-12-27 07:59:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/976365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dean_n_pie/pseuds/dean_n_pie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin can't force Arthur to make a choice. So he makes it for him. "I love you, no matter what I said."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Let You Go

**Author's Note:**

> oh wow this is my first fic and im just transferring it over to ao3 after being on ffn for like ever so yeah
> 
> woot
> 
> nothing belongs to me
> 
> also unbeta'ed

I'm going to let you go because she is perfect for you. And I'm not. And frankly, you deserve more than me. But love, staying here is too difficult for me. I'm trying so hard to not be selfish, to push you away, because all I want is for you to be happy. I can't stand this feeling-like I'm holding you back. We'll never work if I force you to stay.

I love you, no matter what I said. Love, I know how much this must be hurting you. Christ, I can imagine seeing it in your eyes (your eyes always gave away every feeling, even when your face was smooth as ice). I promise, love, it will get better. I swear it. But I can't let you know that. Because if you do, you'll never let me leave, and you have to be with her. I can't give you half the things she can. I see how happy you are when you're with her, and only a fraction of that happiness is directed at me. Who am I to be the selfish one, and ask you to choose me when I know it's her you would choose every time? I can't bear to be the one who asks you to give that up. I. Can't. Compete. With. Her.

I planned out the conversation. The lies, "I don't love you anymore", "We would never have worked out anyway", "I need to be able to be me, without your influence". And I saw each one of them sting when they hit you. Your face remained the same, but I could see the glistening of your eyes and saw your heart breaking through them.

Maybe I'd miscalculated. Maybe you cared more about me than you let on. But truly, you will always belong to her. And we all know that I'm just a stand-in, while you wait for her to come back to you. And I love you. Perhaps too much. And I can't handle the unrequited love I have. So please, chase her. And get her back (we all know she'd go back to you anyway). Please. If you ever cared about me at all, grant me this one last request.

Arthur. I love you. Be happy, without me. And maybe, if we are meant to be, we'll find each other again. But for now, we need some time apart.

I will love you forever, Arthur Pendragon.

-M


End file.
